This whole week I will be posting about the Before, During and After of planning a holiday party in your home. Hope you enjoy this Metamorphosis! :)
Earlier today, I posted the Top 10 Reasons many of us give for not hosting a holiday party in our home. Over the next few days, I want to help you overcome those objections and fears. I am not a certified party planner...just got a few parties under my belt. :) I've always worked outside the home full time, matching my schedule to my son's when he was in preschool, then working full time once he was in Elementary school. So all the parties I've ever given were while working and usually full time. Yes, it's more challenging, but completely doable. Just takes a lot of planning and starting early. I'll share what's worked for me over the past 30 years in hopes you'll find it helpful.
What This Will Not Be:
This will not be a tutorial on how to give a party for 250 people or a tutorial on how to give a bridal shower or a 50th wedding anniversary. And, this will not be a Miss Manners tutorial where I scare the heck out of you with lots of proper dos and don'ts. :)
Instead, this will be a guide to having a fun holiday party in your home for your friends and neighbors. It will be a nuts and bolts, get-down-to-it, kind of tutorial. Some of what I share will easily apply to other types of parties, too.
The Goal:
Whenever I have a party in my home, my goal is to have everything, and I do mean everything, done in advance so on the day of the party, I can be relaxed and just enjoy. :) As I've created these posts, that's been my goal for you, too. I want you to feel calm, confident and ready to have some fun when the doorbell starts ringing on party day.
Here's the schedule for the next few days below. I've wanted to do this series of posts for ages...but wasn't quite sure how to break it all down. So I've decided to just dive in and go for it. :)
Day 1: Invitations...Who to invite, how to send, when to send
Day 2: Getting Ready...Planning and Preparing your home for the party
Day 3: Decorating for the Party
Day 4: The Food, How to serve it...and all the other "Stuff" you'll want to have on hand
Day 5: The Day of the Party
Day 6: After the party and answering your questions...and anything else I forgot to mention :)
I may need to add a day or change the order as we go along. Please be flexible in case I need to take an extra day or rearrange our schedule a bit. :) Now, let's get to it!
Scheduling Your Party: Set Time vs Open House
When you plan your party, you can plan to have it during a set period of time, like 7:00-9:00 PM, or as an "Open House." An Open House is usually just how it sounds...an open house where folks don't have to arrive or leave at a set time. Instead, they can drop by, stay awhile, then leave whenever they like.
An Open House party will usually have a broader time frame, like 1:00-5:00 PM or it might even be the whole day as the mother of a friend of mine liked to do. This is a great party to have if you fear your home is not large enough to accommodate everyone you wish to invite (#3 on our Top Reasons list.) If you think your home will comfortably hold 2o-25 folks at one time, you could invite 50 to an Open House. Most likely your guests will stop by and leave at different times during the period you've specified on the invite, so your home won't feel overcrowded at any one time. We will talk about some other ways to deal with bigger groups later in the week.
What Date to Schedule Your Party:
One of the most popular days for parties is the first and second Saturdays in December. Those are the weekends many businesses plan parties for their employees. If you plan your party for those weekends, you are bound to have a few folks who can't come due to other commitments.
I'm not saying to never plan a party for the first or second Friday or Saturday in December, but just keep in mind, those are the two biggest weekends for holiday parties because as Christmas draws closer, folks get too busy with family and preparations to host parties. So, this means a lot of parties get scheduled those first two weekends in December. (Picking your date carefully will help with Top Reason number 7.)
Sunday afternoons are usually great for Open Houses that are scheduled during the day, like 1-5 PM. That's also usually a very good day for neighborhood get-togethers or Cookie Exchanges. Dad's are usually home to watch the little ones if Mom is invited to a Ladies Cookie Exchange.
If you really want to have your party on the first Friday or Saturday in December, get those invites out early...like last week! You still may have folks who are tied up with their company parties, etc... but you'll have a better chance of having more folks attend those busy weekends if you get the invites out early.
Invitations:
Over the years, the method by which party invitations are sent has changed dramatically. Of course, there are formal invitations one can have printed for "fancy" affairs...like a 50th Wedding anniversary, but that's not what we'll be talking about today.
Ideally, invitations to a party should go out at least 30 days in advance of the date of the party. I've even read 8 weeks but frankly, I think that's a bit too early. I doubt most folks would commit that far in advance but it would give them a heads-up about the party. Of course, that far out, they may forget about it. :) If it's 3 weeks or even 2 weeks out, go ahead and send them. Just know that some folks may have already made commitments to other holiday parties.
There are several ways to send out an invitation to a holiday party:
1. Buy pre-printed or custom printed invitations online or in a local party/gift store and mail them out
2. Use a free site/program like Evite which will e-mail your invite to everyone you specify and will even send them a reminder e-mail if they haven't responded by a particular date
3. Hand deliver the invite to their mail box (like in the case of a neighborhood party)
4. Personally call each and every person on your list (not recommended because it sort of puts folks on the spot) Awkward. ;}
Pre-printed invitations where you fill in the blanks are usually inexpensive. The two shown below were invitations I sent out for previous gatherings...one for an open house we had around Christmas right after moving into our first home 30 years ago and the other for a Christmas party the following year. Yes, I saved a copy all these years in a scrapbook. :)
I adore receiving a party invite in the mail and really love sending them. So, if you don't mind the postage, it's still a fun way to do it. If you want something a little nicer than the pre-printed invites you find in gift shops, you can have some custom printed at many places online like, Announcingitdotcom.
Here's an example from their site:
I've never used this site...just mentioning it to give you an idea of what's available. There should also be stationary/party/gift stores in your community that can have them printed up for you. Another site recommended in the comments was Vistaprint.com. Thanks, Susan for that tip.
Via e-mail:
If would like to keep costs down as much as possible, and who doesn't these days, Evite is completely free and a popular way to send invites. (Some help for Top Reason #4...the tight budget.)
Flyer, Hand-Delivered:
In my neighborhood, almost every year, someone hosts a "cookie exchange" party. I've hosted it a couple of times and here's the "invite" flyer I created one year. I purchased the cute paper at Kinkos and created the invite in a word document. Then I just printed it out on the holiday paper I had purchased. This didn't require any special program...just type up the invite and put the cute invitation paper in the printer and print away.
If you'd like to save ink, you could just print your invitation out on your printer to test the positioning and how it looks, then print one on plain paper and take it down to a copy place where you can have them print it out on your special paper. (The one below has been edited so I could post it here on the World, Wild Web. In the one below, I originally had the subdivision name in front of the word "Ladies" and my phone number was at the bottom. It's now a bad idea to include your e-mail for RSVPs, as well.)
Once I had them printed out, I just walked around my neighborhood and stuck them in the mailboxes. Warning: Some post offices don't like for you to do that...and technically/legally you're not supposed to do it. But it's ok to masking tape it to the mailbox or whatever creative method you can come up with. Just don't do anything that will permanently damage their box. You may want to tuck it in their door. In my neighborhood, folks put flyers for events in the mailboxes all the time and the post office doesn't seem to mind. :) Probably best to do it after the mail runs if you do put it in the mailbox, though.
A party of this nature also helps with Top Reason #4...the tight budget. Normally, if you are hosting a neighborhood party in your home, you may only be expected to provide the drinks or dessert and you can ask your neighbors to bring an appetizer to share. I provided the food when I hosted this cookie party because folks were already bringing several dozen cookies and I just didn't want to ask them to bring food, too. But it isn't unusual for folks to bring a dish to share when it's a neighborhood party.
RSVP vs Regrets Only:
If you would like to know how many folks to expect so you know how much food you'll need, you can put an "RSVP by date" on your invite. RSVP is an abbreviation of the French phrase "Répondez s'il vous plaît." The translation means, "reply, if you please". When you add that to the bottom of your invite, the recipient of the invite should reply either "yes" or "no."
You can list your phone number and/or your e-mail as the contact for the RSVP. That will make it convenient for everyone. I don't recommend a "Regrets Only" option because folks tend to not bother to call if they are not coming. It's just the way it is.
If you haven't given a party in a while or have never given a party before...sit down. I have some bad news for you. Etiquette has all but vanished over the last 20 years in regards to the art of the RSVP. Back twenty years ago,when I sent out party invites, people actually RSVP'd back...they really did. Now, you're lucky if half the folks you invite take time to reply. :( And some folks, will RSVP, "yes" and cancel out the last day after you've already cooked for X number of folks. :( Maybe it's a lack of teaching our children some basic rules of etiquette...not sure.
In any case, be prepared that a couple of days before the party you will most likely have to call some folks who haven't gotten back to you. Also, on the day of the party, you may get 2-3 calls from folks who are canceling out. Don't take it personally and don't let it dampen your spirits.
If you suspect their reason for canceling is made up and not real, you may want to think twice about inviting them again. I usually give folks two chances. If they cancel out the day of the party on two different occasions, and the reason sounds "made-up" I don't invite them again. I usually find that it's folks who don't give or have never given a party before that tend to do this. They really don't have any understanding of the planning and preparation that goes into giving a party.
If you're planning a neighborhood party where folks are all bringing food with them...it may not be as disconcerting when they don't show or don't call until the last minute. But in cases where you are preparing or buying all the food, you need to know and it's perfectly ok for you to call and ask if they will be coming if they haven't RSVP'd back. I've never had anyone be rude when I've called or e-mailed them a few days before a party to verify if they were coming. They are usually apologetic and will give you an answer "yes" or "no" at that time.
Who to Invite:
Well, that's entirely up to you. :) You obviously don't want to invite folks who you know don't like each other or folks who in the past have disrupted a party or made others uncomfortable.
I have to share this funny story. A few years back when I was too young to be a Red Hat, I was a Pink Hat and a member of a Red Hat Club. (Yep, they have Pink Hats, too.) I threw a Christmas party and invited my Red Hat group and a bunch of my friends from my Sunday School class. It turned out, I had around 10-12 folks from each group attend the party. I think I had around 20-22 total.
Anyway, about 30 minutes into the party, I realized that every single person in my dining room was from my SS class and every single person in my family room was from my Red Hat Club...they had all naturally gravitated to the folks they already knew. And let me tell you, neither of these groups of ladies is shy one bit! These are some fun ladies! I had never anticipated this situation. :) I gently tried to get the Red Hats into the dining room to eat, but they just kept talking and visiting with each other. LOL
Finally, I pulled everyone together in the family room for the ornament exchange. After that, everyone was talking up a storm and really had fun getting to know one another. :) So when you are planning your party list, it's nice to have a good mix...not a large number of folks from two separate groups or you could end up with two separate parties going on. :)
Additional tips:
How to make sure those invited know this is a party for the adults only:
If you are at the age where most of your friends have small children, you may want to mention somewhere on your invite that the party is for "Adults Only." I wouldn't word it, "No Children." That sounds a bit harsh. So, instead of stating it as a negative, just state that it's a party for the adults only. Most folks know that a party scheduled in the evening is just for adults, but if you have a friend who you're pretty sure will bring his/her children, you may want to call them in advance and just casually try to mention that this party is for just the "grown-ups" this time. This tends to be more of a problem with weddings than with parties in the home.
Coming up next:
Getting Ready: Planning, cleaning and preparing your home for the big day
Metamorphosis Monday:
If you are participating in Metamorphosis Monday: Please be sure to add your permalink below, and not your general blog address. To get your permalink, click on your post name, then just copy and paste the address that shows up in the address bar at the top, into the "url" box for the picture linky. You'll also need to put your e-mail address in, but don't worry, it will not be visible to anyone.
I'd love it if you would include the MM button in your post, to make it easy for others to find you MM post. To do that, just copy and paste the Met Monday button to your computer or grab the html code from underneath the MM logo on my sidebar.
Please include a link in your MM post back to the host blog, Between Naps on the Porch. Why is this important? When you include a link back to BNOTP, it ensures your regular readers/visitors will find the other awesome "Before and Afters" linked for this Metamorphosis Monday. If everyone links back, this maximizes the visits for all participants.
Please do not add your link below, until your MM post is actually published to your blog. Please DO NOT type in all caps...it spreads the links waaaay out. Thanks! :-)
Let's try something fun today! Please visit the person who linked before you and after you...that way everyone will get some visits. Hope you'll visit more, of course. :-)
Little Reminder: Thank-you for linking back to this post so the regular visitors to your blog will find all your fellow Blogger's posts linked here for this Met Monday. If you find your link has been deleted, it is because your post didn't mention you were participating in Metamorphosis Monday and didn't include a link back to the other participants and/or was not a "Before and After" subject/project.
No comments:
Post a Comment